ABC

Actors
Long story short: Most of the people in L.A. are actors. A very few will 'make it', a very few will call it quits just in time find work 


Artists
The city of movie sets & background, songs, 


Bitches & Boobs


Cheese & Carbs
No one will openly admit to eat either one, but we secretly all crave it. God, you evil carbs & cheeses. 



Dogs
Angelinos love dogs.  No matter where you'll bring your pooch, be sure to not get jealous. He will steal all attention. Going out of town? No problem, Chateu Marmutt (reference to the legendary hotel Chateau Marmont) will make sure your pooch is taken care of royally while you are out of town. 

Edgy

Some Angelenos might tell new arrivals in town to be edgy in order to set themselves apart from the the rest of the dating pool (blonde, tall, skinny). Fact is, you will get noticed if you are edgy. It might bring you the dude for the night, but the next morning you are both waking up to the real you. Awkward. Oops!

Ego 
"Oh, you were talking about me, myself and I? - Please continue."
L.A., you are so lucky! After all, everyone has done something VERY special and VERY important in this town. "Did you see me in the background of the new DiCaprio film, I think you could see me for like 5 seconds." And they will not shy away from the attempt of buttering you up in their irrational and pretentious thinking. 


Food Trucks
L.A. is home to some of the best food trucks and street vendors. 


Golddigger


G-Word
The evil, evil G-word. What, you don't know the G-word - It's gluten of course!!! Although only approxiamately six percent of the U.S. population is actaully allergic to the devil protein composite found in foods processed from wheat and related grain species, we all try to avoid it.


"Have we met?"
You know when you run into an acquaintance and you greet each other with a smile, hello and/or non-obligatory kiss on the cheek or hug? Nu-uh, not so in L.A. 

Here it's not about meeting someone the first time, it's the second time that will tell you who is really standing in front of you. Most likely you will hear the halfhearted "Nice to meet you" (accompanied with a super weak hand shake) for the second time. You are asking why that is? Simply because they are so important and awesome that they obviously forgot about you little piece of nothing down there. 

I expected better from you! Go back up and review lessons from letter E. 

It is funny and sad at the same time, how many divas in L.A. I have met three times for the first time.

The ultimate survival move: Just wait and see what they will do. That will spare you an embarrassing moment, because you will come across as if you had stalked him/her on Facebook. 

"No bitch, I have eyes and brains, we met last Thursday." Of course you would love to say, but it will only make you look inferior and irritated, and who wants to hang out with a stalking psycho at the end of the night? That's right, you will be going home alone without friends or a dude.

Headshot
Overexposed portrait used to show off the pure beauty of the person captured. The other form of I.D. in the city of Angels. You don't have a professional headshot - who are you? 

Hipsters

I am not qualified to write this entry. Ask a hipster when you meet one. How to spot one? Does their attire look like something in between of "I just woke up" and "I'm not trying at all"? You found one! Skinny jeans, pencil 'staches or fedoras will do it too. 

Hit-and-Run

L.A. leads the nation in cases of drivers fleeing the scene of accidents. Be careful when you cross the street or where you park. People don't care. Also read the reckless driving entry under "R".

Hollywood
Totally overrated. Tourists, nightclubs, DUIs and throw-up.



Isolation
L.A. might be one of the biggest cities in the world, but due to its it poor, poor infrastructure it is also one of the loneliest cities. 

Never ever have I spend more time in traffic or on the route to see my friends. L.A. makes being social very hard. That explains my theory of why L.A. is such a dog city: People get pets to not feel so lonely anymore. 

Insecurity
What this city is build on. The answer to all behavior that need explanation.


Juice Cleanse
The way to go in L.A. Summer craze. Great conversation starter. "You juicin'?"

Killing it
Elaborating on 'Ego': Angelenos are obviously always killing it, duh. Always on top of things, always doing the hippest new thing, looking fly and shit. We think we are on top of the world and everyone else is watching us.

L

Malibu
Rich white kids turned surfers because they are too cool for school. Home to many great Memorial Day or Labor Day parties. Some retard will always offer their $5 Million villa.

N

Optimism
Whether it is scoring the next big acting gig that will definitely get you the foot in the door or finding parking at 2am on a Saturday night. Angelions are positive thinkers. However, the lines between optimism, wishful daydreaming and rational thinking are blurry for many living here.

Parking
Nightmare. Unless you live in the Valley, but that is not really L.A, is it?

Q

Reckless Driving
Pair a big set of insufficient driving skills with an over confident and narcissistic driving behavior and voila... you have the ultimate worst traffic scenario. Welcome to my every day misery. 


Swedes
The Swedes love L.A. And L.A. men love Swedes. 
Mainly studying at Santa Monica College, most of them prefer to indulge in Hollywood nightlife an kick it at sceny hipster parties always instagramming (did the AP Stylebook adopt this verb yet?) and updating their blogs. But who would want to send hot Swedish chicks that just want to kick it back to Europe? Nobody! Yes, that's right, I am taking about you Sannas & Johannas, you girls are never allowed to leave again.

T

Unemployed


U-turn
Could easily cost you 10 minutes in traffic. Definitely avoiding it. Need to make a pitstop on the opposite site of the direction you are going? Forget about it. That double U-turn is so not worth it.



Vegan
Welcome to Vegan Capital. Los Angeles IS health-consious, at least for the wealthier folks.